So, I've basically not posted to this blog for almost a year. Last year I went through a bad round of depression, so I took a break from posting. I can say, at first I thought I was just really stressed out and that was the source of all my frustration and anger, etc. But, it just seemed I was really not happy. So I went to my doctor and asked him to evaluate me for possible depression. Turns out, yes, I was probably dealing with some depression. Afterall, I am a stay at home mom of twins, now only 4 years old. Those first few years were stressful, and having two kids going through the terrible twos and threes at the same time was often overwhelming. The doctor pointed out that being under stress for prolonged periods of time can cause depression. He also told me he sees quite a few moms with multiples in his office for the exact same thing. That made me feel better. He told me he thought my depression was mild--moderate and prescribed an antidepressant. I was a big apprehensive about the medication because of all the potential side effects, but went ahead and took it just to see if I noticed a difference. All I can say now is wow, what a difference! I went from being angry, frustrated, ovewhelmed, to occassionally annoyed. Now, I must be honest, I have experienced some of the common side effects from the medication, but I'm willing to put up with it for awhile because the benefit from the medication far outweighs the side effects.
In addition to the medication, I requested a counseling referral. I would like to manage things better on my own and hopefully not have to rely on medication all the time. In June, I completed 5 months of counseling. I learned a few techniques for managing my frustrations, as well as just realizing I am doing so many things right when it comes to parenting, it's just that I have really strong willed kids that have a persistence to challenge me all the time. Good news is, this seems to only happen with Seth and I and thankfully it is not a problem at the girls' preschool or church.
Looking forward to a better year in 2011!
